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| Office/Proposition | L.W. "Left Wing" Loony says | R.W. "Right Wing" Loony says | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|
| US Senator (Full Term) | Katie Porter | Adam Schiff and Barbara Lee would also be wonderful senators. I sure wish we had ranked choice voting, but I have to go with Katie and her whiteboard of justice. When the murderous mob stormed the Capitol, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez went to Katie's office for safety. A single mother of teenagers has no problem handling a mob of insane terrorists. | The perfect candidate: no one seems to know anything about him, so he might not even be a real person. No matter, he has the best web site of any our wonderful GOP candidates. And, unlike Steve Garvey, nobody knows if he voted for Trump TWICE, pretty sure he wasn't a Dodger, and he doesn't look like he's REALLY old. My gut tells me he's a bright red supporter of our Dear Leader, our soon to be rapist felon-in-chief. | |
| US Senator (Partial/Unexpired Term) | Katie Porter | We have to vote separately for who's going to finish the unexpired portion of Diane Feinstein's term. I think this means the winner of this race in November would serve from when the result is certified until Jan. 3, 2025. | Forrest Jones | Oops, Forrest forgot to signup for this one. That's the kind of competence Republicans like to see in our candidates. That's OK, you can write him in. |
| US Representative, 50th | Scott Peters | Conservative, but his heart's in the right place. I might not agree with him on everything, but he's there on all the most important issues, plus he has really good ideas on how to fix congress. | Solomon David Moss | Seems to think Zionists are to blame for chemtrails. Y'know, the secret plot to make everybody gay. Anti-vax, anti-Semetic, the perfect GOP candidate. |
| US Representative, 48th District | Stephen Houlahan | A registered nurse from Santee. It's about time this district was represented by someone who's had to earn a living, who cares about the health and safety and freedom of his fellow citizens, and who actually lives in the district. | Darrell Issa | People say he used to be an arsonist and a car thief and that he doesn't even live in the district and that he thwarted criminal investigations into gun runners by reading the names of wiretap targets into the congressional record and makes a habit of taking illegal campaign contributions, but, hey, nobody's perfect. Besides, he's the perfect supporter of our Dear Leader Trump. Who better to advise the Great Donald on how to avoid getting convicted? Oh, and he's the only San Diego congress-person to vote against protecting women's rights to life-saving medical care. He even co-sponsored a bill to ban IVF. That's the kind of courage we need! |
| US Representative, 49th District | Mike Levin | What's not to like? Defender of voting, education, the environment, jobs, justice, and our tax dollars. Beloved by all, except radical extremists. | Margarita Wilkinson | Four wonderful GOP candidates, a guy who makes commercials where he poisons people with bug spray (Gunderson, probably no relation to the characters in Fargo). Another works for Hyundai and wants to get tough on dangerous criminals. Sorry, Sheryl, you must have missed the memo: that's not what we're about anymore. But, finally, we have a truly wonderful candidate, one who doesn't bother with filing required financial disclosures or attending candidate forums. In fact, nobody seems to know anything about her, except that she seems to be rich and seems to be auditioning for the latest narco-thriller, with that low, sexy voice, sounds like she gargles with razor blades. Where does her money come from? Who cares? Wouldn't it just own the libs if it turns out her money comes from drug cartels? |
| State Senator, 39th | Dr. Akilah Weber | A board-certified obstetrician/gynecologist. All I can say is, "Wow!" Exactly who we need in these troubled times, when our most basic rights are under relentless attack. | Bob Divine | Nobody seems to know anything about him, but that didn't keep him from getting endorsed by the folks who think GOP politicians should make medical decisions for women. |
| State Assembly, 77th District | Tasha Boerner | Fourth generation San Diegan; pretty sure we can trust her to protect our environment and our American way of life. | James Browne | Notable quote: Republicans will stab you in the front. Maybe that's why he doesn't have any endorsements on his website? At least he's got the endorsement of the biblical marriage lady, so he must have convinced her that he's anti-choice. Maybe he doesn't list her endorsement because she's one of those front-stabbers? |
| Judge, Superior Court, No. 19 | Rosy S. Meyerowitz | Running unopposed, but San Diego Bar Association rates her "exceptionally qualified", but they think that of all the judicial candidates this time around. | Gary G. Kreep | I know he's not on the ballot, and he's probably been disbarred and might be in jail, but what a mockery he made of our legal system in his tenure as a judge! I'm disappointed that our Dear Leader didn't appoint him to the federal bench. |
| Judge, Superior Court, No. 38 | Kelly C. Mertsoc | Also unopposed. Lots of endorsements, but none from the enemies of freedom, as far as I can tell. I like that she was a social worker before she became a lawyer. Seems like maybe that should be a requirement for all judges. | ??? | Social worker? I think that means she puts helping others ahead of making money. We can't have judges like that! It's unRepublican! |
| Judge, Superior Court, No. 41 | Jodi Cleesattle | Enthusiastically endorsed by Toni Atkins! That's enough for me, but read her web pages and you can't help but be impressed. And jodiforjudge is a great domain name. | Brian Erickson | Anti-choice, anti-women, what more do you want in a judge? Perhaps a worthy successor to Judge Kreep? |
| Judge, Superior Court, No. 43 | Koryn Sheppard | Law professor and family law specialist and yoga teacher. Sounds good to me. | Valerie Summers | A lady judge who doesn't believe in women's rights? That's my kind of woman! Besides, everyone knows "yoga" is code for satan-worship. |
| Mayor, San Diego | Todd Gloria | Do I wish he'd done more to crack down on illegal vacation rentals? Sure. But, he's been a pretty good mayor and he has made progress on dealing with homelessness and cross-border pollution, so I have high hopes for his second term. I like the concept of Geneviéve L. Jones-Wright, but she hasn't convinced me that she would be a better mayor than Todd. | Jane Glasson | A Republican who wants to give homeless people free breakfast and lunch at our expense? Now I've heard everything. No wonder the county GOP failed to endorse her. The other GOP candidate, Larry Turner, seems to be registered as an independent and probably isn't legally eligible to be mayor on account of he doesn't even live in the city of San Diego. |
| City Attorney, San Diego | Heather Ferbert | Both candidates seem good, but Heather feels like a better successor to Mara Elliot. Whatever else you might say about Mara, she's done a great job of taking guns away from perpetrators of domestic violence. I'm liking the idea of continuity. | R.W. Loony | No Republicans? Sad. IANAL (I Am Not A Lawyer) but write me in anyway. I'm at least as qualified as Aileen Cannon. |
| Measure A, San Diego | YES | Authorizing the City Auditor and the Audit Committee to use outside legal counsel if the Audit Committee determines that it would be in the public's interest. I'd feel better if the committee had to show that the City Attorney had a conflict of interest or lacked the skills/resources for the task, but since the city council has to approve any contract and it has to go through competitive bidding, I think we're OK. | NO | As a Republican, I don't believe there's any such thing as conflict of interest. But, since we're going to have a Democratic City Attorney, it's my duty as a Republican to do everything I can to make their job impossible. I'm so conflicted. |
| Prop 1, California State | YES | Sure it's a ton of money, but if you really want to make a significant dent in homelessness, it's going to take money. Part of the reason this proposition is so long is all the taxpayer protections that are built into it. Provisions to make sure that the money helps people and that allocations can be changed if one solution works better than another. An alarming portion of our homeless population are seniors and veterans. It's our duty to help them. | NO | We Republicans don't believe in coddling the homeless. After all, they wouldn't be homeless if they weren't losers. We need to round them all up and put them in camps where they can work making hats for our Dear Leader while singing patriotic songs, 'It’s fun to work at the Y-M-C-A. You'll be a busy bee, the work will make you free…' |
